“Obama has the nomination”

At least, that is what Tim Russert is saying. Tim, you might want to mention that to Hillary. Winning Indiana probably makes her think otherwise. You think?

Big

Tom Hanks thinks this next presidential election is big. He even has a thought on who we should vote for. Hint: Hanks lives in Hollywood.

Clinging to bitterness

Apparently, Obama got it wrong. Working-class folks don’t cling to religion because they are bitter, they cling to bitterness because they are religious. Take Peggy Noonan. This working-class Irish Catholic says she totally “gets” Rev. Wright’s anger. Bitterness, she feels, is an oppressed people’s perogative. And apparently, it is as much a Black Irish thing as it is a Black thing. Sort of like imbibing the bitter herb in the Passover seder or pressing your tongue against a friendly toothache. We like the pain. It reminds us of our heritage. Sure, we are doing well now, but don’t let that fool you. We are victims through and through. Well, it’s good to know, that after Obama has cut his pastor loose, there is still someone who will stick up for the feisty churchman. Peggy Noonan. A right-wing Republican.

Under the bus

Senator Obama has done it. He has thrown his former pastor under the bus. And thank God and Greyhound, he’s gone. The center-stage appearances of the Rev. Wright and his off-the-wall statements have not only been incendiary, they have been downright sad. It was time to pull the plug. Obama wasted no time. Amen and amen.

Can I get an Amen?

Yes, Rev Wright has been taken out of context. Yes, his sound bites have been unfairly used against Senator Obama. Yes, race-baiting still works in America because racism is endemic to the fallen nature of man. And yes, Jeremiah Wright needs to put a sock in it. And soon.

Little hoax on the prairie

Remember Sarah? The sexually abused 16-year-old who called a San Angelo shelter and set off the raid of that Texas Mormon Ranch? The girl––who after authorities had seized over 400 minors––was nowhere among them? The whistle blower who all these odd, churchy people claimed not to know? Remember her? Well the authorities think they have found her. She appears to be this 33-year-old woman in Colorado who gets her kicks calling shelters and yanking their chain. But the best part? Texas authorities say this changes nothing. These kids have been legally removed and will remain in court custody. Yup, my favorite part of the “separation of church and state” is when the state separates the strangely devout from their strangely devout families. What these kids need are more video games, drugs, booze and reality TV. We’ll get them normal if it kills us. Or them.

Look who’s voting for Obama

Just as soon as the Clinton Campaign and the GOP squeeze all the mileage out of the Rev Wright and the “Bitter” controversies, get ready for this one. Barack Obama consorts with known terrorists!!!! Pictured above is Bill Ayres, a former Weatherman. No, not the guy with the funny maps before the Sportscast– the 1960’s Yippie variety. He plotted the overthrow of our government, protested the Military Industrial Complex and conspired to put LSD in the Jello mold. All about the time Barack Obama was in Pampers. Anyway, today’s he’s a Obama supporter. And fair game. So get ready.

Pro-what?

Sighting a Pro-life Democrat is about as rare as spying an unicorn. But they––unlike unicorns––do exist. In fact, two notable ones have recently endorsed Barack Obama: Pennsylvania’s Senator Bob Casey and Indiana’s former congressman Timothy Roemer. Perhaps, these Pro-life lawmakers have missed the fact that Obama’s voting record is every bit as Pro-choice as Hillary Clinton’s. So what gives? Well, for one thing, the shared belief that Obama can bridge the gulf between these two polarized groups. Obama’s website has always had a link devoted to Pro-life for Obama and he conspicuously avoids the typical red-meat, Roe v Wade rhetoric that Hillary routinely dusts off when addressing feminist groups. Plus, lately, Obama has called for a cease fire between these steadfast opponents. “The mistake pro-choice forces have sometimes made in the past, and this is a generalization . . . has been to not acknowledge the wrenching moral issues involved,” he said. “And so the debate got so polarized that both sides tended to exaggerate the other side’s positions. Most Americans, I think, recognize that what we want to do is avoid, or help people avoid, making this difficult choice. That nobody is pro-abortion — abortions are never a good thing.” Can Obama bring together these two factions? I’ll let you know–– just as soon as I spot that unicorn.

Women without cell phones

Thank goodness for the US government. We have successfully traumatized these children that we have “rescued from child abuse.” We’ve yanked them from their families. We have ruthlessly interrogated them with little success. And we have somehow misplaced the 16-year-old whistle blower who teed off the raid. Now we have confiscated their mother’s cell phones. Talk about cruel and usual punishment! Thank God we are the good guys and not the polygamous, secretive sect.

McCain closes the gap

In a recent poll, John McCain has closed the 10-point gap between himself and Barack Obama. Now, if he can only close the gap with himself.