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Monthly Archives: July 2009

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What does a President do after he calls a Cambridge cop stupid? He gets stoopid with him and his perp. The Beer Summit may be the keenest bit of diplomacy this year. Now can we please get back to fixing health care. Gawwwwwd! Cable news makes me want to puke.

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Another bizarre theory from the evolutionists:

A new study suggests that evolution is making women more beautiful, while men are still stuck in the Stone Age in terms of attractiveness. In a study released last week, Markus Jokela, a researcher at the University of Helsinki, demonstrated that beautiful women had more children than their plainer counterparts and a higher proportion of those children were female. Those children also tended to be attractive and to repeat the pattern of having more female children once they became adults, according to the study. The Times online reported that data was gathered in America, from 1,244 women and 997 men, who were followed over four decades. Their attractiveness was rated from photographs taken during the study. Researchers also looked at the number of children they had. The study found attractive women had 16 percent more children, and very attractive women had 6 percent more children than their less attractive counterparts. But the study found that the opposite is true for men, with handsome men being no more successful than others in terms of numbers of children. Scientists said this suggested there was little pressure for men’s appearance to evolve.

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Texas is the one state with it’s very own panhandle. And now it has a Governor who is panhandling to fund the state’s unemployment fund. That’s right, the same Governor Perry who turned down $555 million in stimulus money from the Federal Government, is asking the same to spot him the money to cover the state’s short fall. All of which means that Texas businesses are about to get a rate hike from the state. Which, of course, affects their ability to hire. Which, of course, increases the number of people who are applying for unemployment. Which all begs the question, “What part of the word stimulus, does Rick Perry not understand?”

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Health care reform will not be obstructed by the Republicans. But there are plenty of Democrats that will do the job for them. This from David Sirota:

Here’s a truism: The wealthiest 1 percent have never had it so good.

According to government figures, 1-percenters’ share of America’s total income is the highest it’s been since 1929, and their tax rates are the lowest they’ve faced in two decades. Through bonuses, many 1-percenters will profit from the $23 trillion in bailout largesse the Treasury Department now says could be headed to financial firms. And, most of them benefit from IRS decisions to reduce millionaire audits and collect zero taxes from the majority of major corporations.

But what really makes the ultrawealthy so fortunate, what truly separates this moment from a run-of-the-mill Gilded Age, is the unprecedented protection the 1-percenters have bought for themselves on the most pressing issues.

To review: With 22,000 Americans dying each year because they lack health insurance, Congress is considering universal health care legislation financed by a surcharge on income above $280,000—that is, a levy almost exclusively on 1-percenters. This surtax would graze just 5 percent of small businesses and would recoup only part of the $700 billion the 1-percenters received from the Bush tax cuts. In fact, it is so minuscule, those making $1 million annually would pay just $9,000 more in taxes every year—or nine-tenths of 1 percent of their 12-month haul.

Nonetheless, the 1-percenters have deployed an army to destroy the initiative before it makes progress.

The foot soldiers are the Land Rover Liberals. These Democratic lawmakers secure their lefty labels by wearing pink-ribbon lapel pins and supporting good causes like abortion rights. However, being affluent and/or from affluent districts, they routinely drive their luxury cars over middle-class economic interests. Hence, this week’s letter from Boulder, Colo., dot-com tycoon Rep. Jared Polis, D, and other Land Rover Liberals calling for the surtax’s death.

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It wasn’t racial profiling. A neighbor had called the police and said two black men were breaking into the house. The cops came looking for black men. Big duh. A black elitist Harvard professor got all huffy and belligerent. The cops arrested him. Not for being black, but for being an ass. And, by the way, racial profiling happens all the time. But the poor bastards it happen to have enough sense to not mouth off to a guy with a club, a gun and a badge. There. I have finally gotten this off my chest.

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Walter Cronkite has signed off. And with the screaming, talking heads of CNN, FOX and MSNBC, it appears that American’s most trusted newsman is a short, Jewish comedian on the Comedy Channel. And that… is the way it is.

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Senator Joe loved to hear himself talk. The judicary confirmation hearings were always a joy when reambling Joe Biden opened his mouth. Rambling on rarely having a cogent point. Well, Joe has moved on but he has found his equal in the junior Senator from Minnesota. Just listen to him wax eloquent about watching Perry Mason as a kid. That’s right, baby boomers see the world through a television screen. I get it. Just like I see the world through SNL reruns. Stuart Smalley goes to Washington. How appropriate.

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Okay, boys. The recession is over. Everybody back to work.

Goldman declined to comment over the weekend, pending its Tuesday earnings report.But if the analysts are right — and given the vagaries of Wall Street trading, any hard forecast is little more than a guesstimate — the results will extend a remarkable run for Goldman that was marred only by the single quarterly loss last fall of $2.12 billion.Goldman Sachs is betting on the markets, but the markets are also betting on Goldman: Its share price has soared 68 percent this year, closing at $141.87 on Friday. The stock is still well off its record high of $250.70, reached in 2007. In essence, Goldman has managed to do again what it has always done so well: embrace risks that its rivals feared to take and, for the most part, manage those risks better than its rivals dreamed possible.

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John McCain has said it best. Sarah Palin can best serve the people of Alaska by not serving the people of Alaska. Can I get an Amen?

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Sarah Palin first appeared in the Anchorage Daily News in 1996, as a typical Alaskan Hockey Mom looking for chance to rub up against second-hand glamour and fame:

Sarah Palin, a commercial fisherman from Wasilla, told her husband on Tuesday she was driving to Anchorage to shop at Costco. Instead, she headed straight for Ivana. And there, at J.C. Penney’s cosmetic department, was Ivana, the former Mrs. Donald Trump, sitting at a table next to a photograph of herself. She wore a light-colored pantsuit and pink fingernail polish. Her blonde hair was coiffed in a bouffant French twist.

”We want to see Ivana,” said Palin, who admittedly smells like salmon for a large part of the summer, ”because we are so desperate in Alaska for any semblance of glamour and culture.”

Okay. Now it get it. Sarah Palin is not just a dim, vapid and bigotted drama queen. She is a glamour stalker.

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This photo insinuates that our president may have more on his mind that global affairs. Watch the replay for the full story.

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A candid Peggy Noonan was caught off mike, day one, decrying the disaster that is Sarah Palin. Then, like a good Republican, she gushed over how a star was born at her Vice Presidential debate winkathon. Now, once again, Peggy drinks the truth serum and calls a spade a spade:

Sarah Palin’s resignation gives Republicans a new opportunity to see her plain—to review the bidding, see her strengths, acknowledge her limits, and let go of her drama. It is an opportunity they should take. They mean to rebuild a great party. They need to do it on solid ground.
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Her history does not need to be rehearsed at any length. Ten months ago she was embraced with friendliness by her party. The left and the media immediately overplayed their hand, with attacks on her children. The party rallied round, as a party should. She went on the trail a sensation but demonstrated in the ensuing months that she was not ready to go national and in fact never would be. She was hungry, loved politics, had charm and energy, loved walking onto the stage, waving and doing the stump speech. All good. But she was not thoughtful. She was a gifted retail politician who displayed the disadvantages of being born into a point of view (in her case a form of conservatism; elsewhere and in other circumstances, it could have been a form of liberalism) and swallowing it whole: She never learned how the other sides think, or why.

Sarah Palin’s resignation gives Republicans a new opportunity to see her plain—to review the bidding, see her strengths, acknowledge her limits, and let go of her drama. It is an opportunity they should take. They mean to rebuild a great party. They need to do it on solid ground. Her history does not need to be rehearsed at any length. Ten months ago she was embraced with friendliness by her party. The left and the media immediately overplayed their hand, with attacks on her children. The party rallied round, as a party should. She went on the trail a sensation but demonstrated in the ensuing months that she was not ready to go national and in fact never would be. She was hungry, loved politics, had charm and energy, loved walking onto the stage, waving and doing the stump speech. All good. But she was not thoughtful. She was a gifted retail politician who displayed the disadvantages of being born into a point of view (in her case a form of conservatism; elsewhere and in other circumstances, it could have been a form of liberalism) and swallowing it whole: She never learned how the other sides think, or why. In television interviews she was out of her depth in a shallow pool. She was limited in her ability to explain and defend her positions, and sometimes in knowing them. She couldn’t say what she read because she didn’t read anything.  She was utterly unconcerned by all this and seemed in fact rather proud of it: It was evidence of her authenticity. She experienced criticism as both partisan and cruel because she could see no truth in any of it. She wasn’t thoughtful enough to know she wasn’t thoughtful enough. Her presentation up to the end has been scattered, illogical, manipulative and self-referential to the point of self-reverence. “I’m not wired that way,” “I’m not a quitter,” “I’m standing up for our values.” I’m, I’m, I’m.

Peggy is so much better when she is not being a party hack.

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It didn’t take a 12K gold casket to tote off the remains of Sarah Palin’s political aspirations. Still at the peak of her game (Hockey), she moonwalked off the stage leaving an admiring right wing fringe reeling in grief. Never fear, nature abhores a vacuum. And the good Lord has provided someone equally unqualified, and almost as fetching, to carry on the torch. And this little gal can torch the socialist, fascist liberalsphere with as much cuteness and betcha-golly charm as  America’s favorite Hockey Mom. You’ll remember her as the dumb blonde with the squeaky voice from the mid 80’s SNL crew. Victoria Jackson. She’s dopey like Palin, only articulate:

I woke up in the middle of the night and realized the trick. You see, evil doesn’t just show up.  It disguises itself as something nice; so you’ll let it in.  It tricks you.

Murdering babies is called Pro-Choice.  Unfair Censorship is called The Fairness Doctrine.  Outlandish Taxes and the Death of Freedom is called Cap & Trade.  Sounds like Fish & Chips.  You gotta figure out the trick…

Social Security and Medicare are broke.  Baby boomers, like me, are getting old and will soon be asking for it.  Socialized medicine makes people die...Obama legally kills babies and now he can legally kill Grandmas!

Hitler did this.  He killed the weak, the sick, the old, and babies and races/religions he didn’t like.  Hitler also controlled the media.  (Where’s the public debate between scientists on “Climate Change/Global Warming?”)   Hitler had the VW bug invented as the state car. What will O’s nationalized car be? So… kill off the weak.  That’s the plan.  Tax the workers to death.  Erase the middle class.  Sounds like the evil governments we studied in high school long ago.  The evil governments were :  kings, oligarchies, facist, socialist, and communist.  Now it’s called the Obama Administration.

Obama is Hilter. Can this gal coin a catch phrase or what? The GOP is saved. Jackson 2012. Seriously.

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We had a particularly bucolic 4th of July this year in Dallas. A flag-waving neighborhood parade. A fried chicken and watermelon meal with friends. And a church-sponsored sing along full of patriotic songs followed by barbeque and a pie tasting. It all felt so wholesome and small town America. As I sat in my creaky wooden pew watching a gregarious bearded priest lead octogenerian servicemen in George M. Cohan’s It’s a Grand Old Flag, I imagined that outside the narthex doors existed  a quaint, rural town, bustling with salt-of-earth types  chock full of small-town values and homespun homilies. At the barbeque after the musical entertainment, my wife and I shared a table with a group of other church visitors.  They were friendly, plain-spoken folk who shared their names, their hometown origins and their hot-enough-for-ya? pleasantries. Then, as I was returning from the parish pie-tasting, a portly man with a Clark Gable moustache  went off on those damn Democrats. Apparently, President Obama had spent the National Day of Prayer cosying up to homosexuals. Bad move, that. Homosexuaity, J.R. (that was his name, I can’t make this stuff up) informed the table, is the most vile, and perverted form of wickedness ever perpetrated by the Devil. I quietly ate my cherry pie, stared vacantly around the Tudor-inspired Episcopal chapel and listened to J.R. rant. Sure, I could have graciously concurred with J.R. that homosexual sex was a most wicked behavior generally decried in both Testaments and add that it is found side-by-side with those equally wicked heterosexual sins of adultery, lasciviousness, and fornication. I could have pointed out to my dear J.R. how a  good Republican like Mark Sanford had spent Father’s Day dittling his Argentine mistress, behavior uniformly condemned by Holy Writ. Equally Satanically-inspired and far more pervasive in our culture– and perhaps our own personal pasts–than homosexual buggery. I could have cited the Apostle Paul who said that the sexually immoral of both stripes shall not inherit the kingdom of God and its colloary “and such were some of you, but you have been washed.” I could have, but instead , I shook J.R.’s meaty hand and said it had been a pleasure meeting him. After all, had this really been a small town in America, everyone would be talking like J.R. about that damn  gay-loving Obama. I walked out the church’s doors, so happy to live in a big, diverse city. Proud to be an American, if not one of those “True” Americans with their old-fashioned values and their mainstream sins.